Heath Ledger’s Final Days, Update your Closet, Holly Hunter Fab at 51, Jodie Foster on her friend Mel Gibson’s Meltdown, Do’s and Don’ts of 2009 – two stacks of magazines two feet tall, latest news, fashion, decorating tips – unwrapped and unread beginning August 2009, the month X departed.
This is a peculiar weekend. Released from the aggression of divorce and trepidation of the Great Trial, I float lightly. A book not noticed for a year and a half, a drawer not cleaned in as long. Clothes not seen, calendar pages unturned.
Both counter and cranny call for attention. There is not a spot in this house that has not beckoned. And I can address none.
Transfixed by the physicality of life, I am caught in the dispersal pattern of raindrops, the satisfaction of slowly wiping dust away, and of breath, dropped to my belly, rather than held tight in my chest.
I have been away a long, long time. This changed place, this life, is mine to explore, to grow. I circumnavigate a landscape where each feature – each object, each person – has a new dimension, just waiting to be discovered.
The magazines? History to be recycled and made new. Just like me.
Shouldn't...but Do 
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